Santa - The Missing Years

Santa - The Missing Years
12/22/2004
by Tom Flannery copyright 2004

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I knew Santa Claus he was a friend of mine
grew up together corner south st and vine
his daddy used to drink his mom she slept around
so Santa ended up on the wrong side of town
Trigger of a temper with a belly full of wine
but the heart of a child who cried all the time
something was missing that's all that he said
I'd pick him off the floor and get him off to bed

Santa liked the ladies loved to make 'em cry
till the future Mrs. Claus well...she caught his eye
a fine looking woman with legs up to here
said she lived up North with a pack of reindeer
Santa was intrigued more than taken aback
when he tried for 2nd base and she stopped him in his tracks
He said "no woman has ever said no to me"
she said "honey not tonight but there's a possibility"

Santa fell in love at the altar of that girl
they talked about the suffering all around the world
she said "lets take a child and try to make her smile"
Santa said "for you baby I'd fly a million miles"
So she told him 'bout the reindeer introduced him to the elves
Santa just scratched his head and smiled to himself
saying "baby I want these kids to have more than I had
a whore for a mother and a drunk for a dad"

She said "Santa when you get home I'll be waiting up for you
in that little elf costume that I just outgrew
I'll make your beard turn white just like the driven snow
You make the children smile and.....ho ho ho
So Santa makes it 'round the world in a few hours time
pushes the reindeer to the limit but it's all so sublime
he finally has some love waiting back at home
this world's a better place when Santa's not alone