Let's wiretap Santa Claus
never know what he'll do
giving presents to little liberals
and a terrorist or two
giving aid and comfort
putting our troops at risk
ho ho ho my ass
he needs an electronic frisk

Let's wiretap Santa Claus
find out where's he's been
and what God he believes in
can I get an amen
ignoring no fly zones
blowing off the TSA
his elves are probably illegals
someone call the CIA

He wears the red and white
but tell me where's the blue?
maybe you should move to France
if that's not enough for you

Let's wiretap Santa Claus
put a tail on them reindeer
can you tell me what they're up to
the other 364 days of the year?
you want the smoking gun
to be a mushroom cloud?
it's still the constitution
it's just covered with a shroud

He wears the red and white
but tell me where's the blue?
maybe you should move to France
if that's not enough for you

Lets wiretap Santa Claus
never know what he'll do
giving presents to little liberals
and a terrorist or two
giving aid and comfort
putting our troops at risk
ho ho ho my ass
he needs an electronic frisk

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